The Brain of Bryn

A Shift

A shift.

This morning- I felt a shift.

FINALLY.

Because for the past few months, I’ve been stuck. Trapped in place.

Exhausted— even after an 8-hour sleep
Unfocused— very distracted or zoning out while time passes
Isolated— dear friends and family who have had to wait patiently for me to reconnect because I have not been in an emotional space or had the energy for a conversation (even when I crave the connection- such a strange feeling)- and then, the guilt I feel for not connecting is a whole other layer of isolation
Emotional— unregulated in that I could be feeling like I am holding in my breath and emotions, and then 2 minutes later crying “out of nowhere”
Overwhelmed— all the client and household projects which need attention and have been getting little to none of my time
Sedentary— moving to complete tasks that absolutely need to done, but taking no extra effort to exercise or stretch –so now I am beginning to feel like the Tin Man from the Wizard of Oz

And then pile on the grief of losing Norman the cat, the worry of a missing colony cat, the challenges and pain many I love are going through right now, 9/11 anniversary, entrepreneurial pressures and the general state of the world…

But this morning- I feel different.

Things are changing and shifting all around me in the lives of people I love, but there was nothing that screamed out— THIS IS THE THING! And yet, here I am.

Feeling hopeful, motivated, grateful, emotional and positively charged.

Finally sat down in front of my computer and finished thanking each person who sent an outpouring of love on social media when Norman died 6 weeks ago. So very grateful to my community for essentially giving me a huge virtual hug!
Contacted a few people on my “Advisory Council” to ask for help in a few areas- because I have been isolating and procrastinating. There are gifted people who can and will definitely help me if I ask.
Calmly and steadily worked through a plan for someone who needed a “thought-partner”
Reached out to say I love you to a group of people who are having a particularly challenging day
Organized the work that needs to get done over the next few days in an actionable and realistic list- finally!
Took a little spiritual time to recenter myself. I have been pushing past that grounding practice for MONTHS. My journal and favorite inspirational books literally have dust on them (oh, because I have not been doing housework either). I was “too busy”. (umm… too busy zoning out and feeling exhausted?)

I share all this as a bit of an affirmation to myself. It is always more real when I see it in writing. A reminder for Future Bryn (I love her) that once again one of my guiding principles for life really works.

Don’t Quit Before The Miracle

I am watching it happen all around me to people I love and for clients every day.

It works for me, too. The “stuck” feeling ended. I just had to go THROUGH it all and have faith.

Perhaps this might be helpful to you as well.

NOW

NOW.

NOW has never been my forte.

I am so much more likely to CONSIDER it, ANALYZE it, PROCRASTINATE about it, DISCUSS it with people, COMPARE it to other options, ADD it to my endless and unrealistic to do list and SCHEDULE it for another day.

“IT” could be anything from cleaning my house to purging a drawer to making a phone call to reading a book I’ll surely love to taking up a new hobby to “getting healthy” to finishing a client project. Anything and everything falls into the “IT” category.

So, I decided to experiment a little. Live in the NOW. Get an idea and take a baby step NOW. Not completely sideline what I am doing for something else like a ping pong ball of “unproductivity”. But just a little step the next time I have a free moment.

And after 3 days of these baby steps, is it possible I can already see forward movement in a few areas?

VERY COOL!

In the spirit of NOW, I wanted to take this little step and tell everyone about this shift because maybe you want to try it also.

Lessons from the Groundhog

When I reference Groundhog Day, I can’t help but think of that hysterical 1993 movie starring Bill Murray and Andie MacDowell. If you have never seen it (although I would question where you’ve been!), Bill Murray’s character experiences the same Groundhog Day over and over again. Each time the day starts again, he adjusts based on what he knows will happen so he can get it “just right”.

And then in 2017, Andy Karl brilliantly led the Broadway musical adaptation straight to a Tony nomination for Best Lead Actor in a Musical.

This movie and Broadway show has me reflecting on two lessons I have learned over the years that look a lot like this Bill Murray/Andy Karl character’s experience:

FIRST: My days of living the Groundhog Day life in my career and business are over.

I learned early in my corporate career to save everything- every file, every document and every email trail- because invariably the senior leadership team would reposition an old project or initiative as a brand new, enterprise-wide opportunity in which I could be put in charge. Common practice was to pull out those saved files, “re-label” them and start over again. It got so bad in 2002 that I bought my entire team a copy of the movie! (VHS of course)
Today as an entrepreneur everything is new -every day. No reusing ideas for me. Definitely tapping into to old ideas that have expanded or evolved- but not that horrible “been here already feeling”. It is all fresh and exciting. No more slapping another name or spin on an initiative and calling it new! Phew.
Even better, on a daily basis I am in a position to inspire career clients (who are mostly in large, bureaucratic organizations) to weather those Groundhog Day moments (pun intended -smile)

SECOND: The Universe will continue to put similar people, situations and opportunities in my path until I learn the lesson I am here to learn.

It is often equal parts frustrating and hysterical. Like the movie Groundhog Day, I just keep coming back to the scenario over and over again, adjusted a bit each time, until I make the major shift.
Most recently it has been a trust issue I have been forced to pay attention to— because the trust challenges came to me through a few friendships, a big client and a financial obstacle. 1-2-3-Right in my face. Ugly. A chance for me to stop feeling like Bill Murray and to change it forever.

Where is that happening in YOUR life?

Monday Morning Lessons from Wonder Cat

5 a.m. Monday morning. Curled up in bed. Super comfy.

Listening to NYC waking up. Just quietly thinking about the fabulous week I had and the very busy work week I have ahead when–

... flying through the air

… Wonder Cat leaps from the dresser to the desk

… sliding across like Tom Cruise in Risky Business

… bringing everything with him on his dismount

++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

Lesson 1: Do not leave any unfinished coffee on your desk at night EVER AGAIN

Lesson 2: If you are going to leave coffee on your desk, it should be your current favorite flavored coffee (mine is coconut) so that all of your work documents and office supplies smell like that favorite coffee flavor for days to come

Lesson 3: Name your cat with a name that rhymes with your favorite expletive, so when you scream it in the wee hours of the morning, he will think you are simply calling him loudly or perhaps cheering him on in his chosen Olympic sport of Feline Furniture Jumping.

Lesson 4: On Monday morning before the sun comes up, always look for those opportunities to fully clean your desk, hang your blotter to dry, rearrange your desk items, attempt to save your damp paperwork and pray that your soggy computer is in working order.

Lesson 5: Why did I ever get away from the habit of clearing my desk each night? Closing my computer. Putting extraneous items in their special place. You better believe that I will be going back to that habit moving forward. My guess is that remembering to clear off my desk is far easier than training a cat!

Lesson 6: If you have a pet, do not for one moment believe that you run your own home.

#ChucktheWonderCat

My Date with Sylvester Stallone

As you probably know, Philadelphia is home to the “Rocky Steps”. The beautiful set of stairs leading up to the Philadelphia Museum of Art made famous in the iconic scene from the 1976 Rocky movie. A few summers ago on a hot summer day, I visited those famed steps and the Rocky tribute statue for the first time with my niece. Back then- in that moment- I believed the magical feeling of those steps was going to inspire me to get in shape. Lose those extra pounds. Make different choices.

Guess what! It didn’t happen. I didn’t lose the extra pounds. I didn’t get in shape.

In fact, last month I was standing on those same steps feeling awful.

Emotional.
Winded.
Overweight.
Hot.

Acutely aware that the promise I made to myself several years ago in that same spot had been broken.

Broken by ME!

But there I was in the blazing sun with a pasted smile on my face and a lump in my throat trying to ignore the overwhelming rush of defeat. My boyfriend wanted to take photos of us with the Philadelphia skyline backdrop. Take videos running up the steps. Just as I remembered Sylvester Stallone doing so many times in my mind over the past 4 decades. It could have been so fun and silly!

And all I wanted to do was sob!

The broken promise to myself weighing on me like an anchor around my neck. Ruining our sightseeing. Feeling bigger than life.

And then a little voice in my head said:

“What if you really did it this time? What if you didn’t break the promise? What if you followed through? What if you didn’t quit? What if you believed in yourself?”

As I stood in the footprints of Rocky looking out over the city, that little voice turned into a commitment (how does that HAPPEN!?)

Next Spring, I will return to Philadelphia and bound up the stairs in Rocky-style fashion, loudly singing the movie theme song, in amazing shape. Strong. Active. Happy. Inspired. Confident. Accomplished. As my “best self” at 55.

I KNEW this was real and that this time it was going to happen because I was crying beneath my sunglasses. My personal litmus test: When I cry, I know it is real.

Clearly it is time for a change. Time for a challenge. Time to kick it up a few notches. Time to stop breaking promises to myself in many areas of my life, beginning with my health!

Damn, that little voice in my head is so powerful. Replacing the negative self-talk, throughout the years that little voice has challenged me at some of the most pivotal times of my life (oh, there are stories to tell). It has created milestones for me to achieve. And once I hear it, I can’t “un-hear” it.

My best guess is that while I was standing there fighting back my tears as my boyfriend snapped selfies, I was actually at another one of the pivotal points in my life and did not even know it. All I knew was that the “little voice” wouldn’t stop talking.

Where have you received unexpected inspiration?

What were you doing when you heard the message you needed to hear seemingly out of nowhere?

For me, it always happens when I am simply living in the moment. And I certainly never would have guessed that Sylvester Stallone would be involved. Apparently, Sylvester and I have a date in Spring 2022.

I’m Not Waiting Any Longer

One of the outcomes of this crazy time we have been living in is my visceral need to RELEASE!

It is like a calling. A voice telling to me to release STUFF– but, also to release OLD HABITS and OUTDATED BELIEFS that no longer serve me. All of these cluttered things and ways of thinking are holding me back from expansion. They are holding me back from joy. So…

I am reading the books I’ve been “saving” to read on vacation (I would need to be permanently on vacation to finish them all)
I am pulling out the bazillion skeins of yarn stored in my closet and creating some new, imperfect projects (rather than saving it all for some special project that never gets realized)
I am sorting through my hall closet to purge items I never use and embrace what is trapped in a back corner (I know there are things I have not even touched since I moved to this apartment almost a decade ago)
I am using all the fancy paper napkins that I saved for literally a decade for that special party I was going to throw (and never did)
I am writing notes to friends on the reams of stationary and cards I have been saving for just that perfect occasion (and then would buy more in the process as the “special” stationary went unused)
I am pulling out photos of family and friends to put in frames around my home and on the screensaver of my Apple TV. My homes have only had a handful of photos displayed for almost THIRTY YEARS (instead of waiting for the perfect frames and perfect configuration)
I am writing in the pretty notebooks that I saved for just the right thoughts (umm… aren’t all my thoughts important?- ha)
I began enjoying my morning coffee from the prettiest coffee mugs– from the hodge-podge collection gifted to me by a variety of fabulous women in my life (I smile and connect with that particular woman every time I sip from “her”)
I am eating dinner on the beloved (and chipped) set of dishes that don’t match a single thing in my house – dishes when put together as a set create an image of Seurat’s painting A Sunday Afternoon on the Island of La Grande Jatte (my absolute favorite piece of art!)

And I reconfigured and reorganized all the art on my walls. Even bought myself a few new pieces that utterly delight me. One of the best things I have done- FOR ME- is to place framed prints and original artwork featuring SNOW all around my house. I can always see snow! (ohhh- if you know me, you know that snow is one my my very favorite things!)

Two of the pieces of original art are especially significant. One from a West Coast artist and another from a talented friend in NYC. Both paintings made me cry when I saw them displayed. I bought them for myself around the same time– over 18 years ago–when I was in a truly miserable point in my marriage– and the same fate befell them both. They were shoved into storage until I left that marriage. In my first “single” home after my marriage ended, I hung them proudly.

Yet somehow in my current apartment, they were sidelined again. Until this week when they joined the collection of “snow art” decorating my walls and inspiring me every day!

What are you “waiting” to use in your life?

What “perfect circumstances” is it time to abandon?

Covid Career Confessions: Manage Your Square

During this time where we are all spending SO MUCH TIME at our computers and ON VIDEO, have you thought much about how well you “manage your square”?

+ Is it time to make adjustments?
+ Are you setting yourself up for success?
+ Are you thinking about it too much?
+ Do you feel like a member of the Brady family most days?
+ Or has it all disintegrated into raucous laughter like the Hollywood Squares?

Here are some of my ideas and considerations for all of the professional time (and personal time) we spend on camera these days. I have been talking to clients about this issue for a decade — from way back when video interviews really hit the job seeker world in a big way. But this global pandemic basically pointed a giant magnifying glass at this concern.

This week’s video is a message DIRECTLY to each of you.

LINK TO THE VIDEO: https://bit.ly/BrynManageYourSquare

Thinking of you and YOUR square!

Bryn💗

Covid Confessions: Just One Thing

Just One Thing I Want You to Know

The past few months have brought a lot of change and much reflecting for all of us. Below is a link to some of my personal reflecting in the form of a new video series– beginning with a few COVID CONFESSIONS!

These are thoughts, feelings and inside glimpses to my emotional shifts– both personal and professional– during this global pandemic- often reflected in the concerns of my clients as well.

And take note: This message is speaking DIRECTLY to each of you.

LINK TO THE VIDEO: http://bit.ly/BrynJustOneThing

Thinking of you!

Bryn💗

Covid Confessions: Sunday Thoughts

Sundays: An Inside Look at a Career Therapist

The past few months have brought a lot of change and much forced prioritization for all of us. Below is a link to some of my personal reflecting in the form of a new video series– beginning with some COVID CONFESSIONS!

These are thoughts, feelings and inside glimpses to my emotional shifts– both personal and professional– during this global pandemic- often reflected in the concerns of my clients as well.

It felt really important to share these insights with you.
Not all at once, of course- ha- that would be beyond overwhelming and I certainly don’t want to contribute to the current madness!

Just a little bit at a time like the drip-drip-drip of a brewing pot of coffee.

Grab a cup and enjoy.
Please let me know if you identify.

LINK TO THE VIDEO

Bryn💗

LinkedIn: Big Impact with a Few Quick Actions

It probably goes without saying, but I’ll say it anyway:

LINKEDIN IS A POWERFUL TOOL FOR NETWORKING, JOB SEARCH, SALES AND RESEARCH.

Therefore, it is very important that you create a professional profile to complement your resume or business website. Tell your personal brand story in alignment with your goals and your background.

Unfortunately, too often LinkedIn users fall into one of two beliefs that hold them back from the power of the tool.

Viewing their profiles simply as an electronic resume. If you are one of those people, I implore you to STOP that right now. Instead, think of it as a personal brand statement that allows you to shine in the eyes of the recruiters, hiring managers, key influencers, potential clients, and future collaborators. LinkedIn can be less formal and more representative of your personality and work style than a resume.
Thinking of LinkedIn as a static placeholder- perhaps a “necessary evil”. Everyone says they “should” have a profile up there, so it was created ages ago and left there to attract digital cobwebs.

For those of you who want to break from one of these common scenarios and create a big impact with only a few quick actions, take a look at these five ideas below. A great place to begin.

Photo

Pleasant and smiling professional photo. This does not need to be a formal headshot. Have a friend pull out that phone, camera, computer or iPad and take a new photo. Those profiles without a photo are often seen by recruiters as suspect- as if you are hiding something.

The photo should only contain you (no group shots or others cropped out with their arm around you) and should be recent.

The “recent” photo is important because it will often be used to identify you when meeting for informational interviews in a public place or to feel like there is a face beyond the voice on a phone interview.

Headline

LinkedIn gives users an opportunity to feature themselves through a summary statement called the headline. On your profile it appears directly below your name. When profiles are searched by recruiters or hiring managers, the headline also appears directly below your picture in their search results. Often times is one of the first pieces of data used to scan possible candidates or connections. Put some extra time into this field.

Consider personalizing this field a little bit- rather than simply filling it with your current title. Include your goals or interests. Perhaps use the title or description that you to refer to your work when asked at a networking event. You could also tack on the name of the company at the end of the title if you feel it helps to define you.

Event Producer and Technology Enthusiast
Global Talent Acquisition Leader |Passionate about Diversity & Inclusion
Mission-Driven and Innovative Higher Education Professional
Finance Leader at American Express

About

Think “executive summary”.

This should be in paragraph form- no more than 3 paragraphs and should include keywords that an organization might be searching for in relation to your skills and experience.

This summary is an ideal place to tell the story of who you are and where you see yourself going. It should highlight your resume or your business and give everyone insight into what differentiates you.

Assume this is the only part someone reads.

This section is “searchable” in keyword search boxes by recruiters/ managers/ LinkedIn users.

Contact Info

Double check your contact information. Be certain that you have the email address and phone number that you would like new or established contacts to use. You can control who sees this information in your Settings & Privacy section.

Even better, add in your website, blog, social sites and birthday to round out the section. Warning: Do not add these elements to your profile unless they are active, consistently utilized and job search/business appropriate.

Current Position and Education Listed

In the highlighted box at the top of your profile (info section), your current role and education are listed to the right of your photo and headline.

For those of you who currently have multiple roles and/or multiple educational institutions in your history, you will see that LinkedIn defaults to the most recent.

Here are a few options:

You can turn on/off the display of your education on the profile area (there is a check box in the editable area)
You can drag suppress education dates or drag current featured employment entries in different order in the Experience section to manipulate which current employment option is featured.

Focusing on these 5 areas of your LinkedIn profile first will boost your visibility and the perceived professionalism of your personal profile. Next you can begin to dig into some of the more advanced profile shifts and decisions you have available to you.

Baby steps. Start simple.